When I joined a business architect course I thought my next 3 months would be learning about marketing, finance and social media. How wrong was I?

The first thing my course did was to get to me to focus on what service I was actually providing. Who was my 'ideal client' and how do I help? I guess I thought I knew this already as I was good at what I do and I had plenty of happy clients, but putting it all down and paper and telling a near stranger why I do what I do was a new experience.

I started by explaining that as a mum, sometimes you feel lost, like your life is not your own anymore, like these little bundles of energy - who you love with all your heart - have consumed you to the point where you want to shout "There's More to Me than just a Mum"

But the truth is that the fact that we love our kids "with all our hearts" is part of the problem. There is no space left for us. For our needs, for our fun, for our future....

We work so hard to teach our kids how to live, love, learn and laugh, but what are we really teaching them when we don't - ever - have time to focus on our own happiness? Children learn by example and we need to set an example that we matter, we look after ourselves, we make sure our needs are met so that we can be the calm, fun mothers they want us to be. (Not the stressed out shouty, raging, emotional women we can sometimes turn into when our Life Balance is out of whack and our kids are playing up!)

So I sat, I considered and I thought about all the lovely clients I have worked with from all across the UK and I realised we all have one thing in common. We are mothers yes, but we are also individuals. We have dreams, we have joys outside our children and we have futures.

One of the biggest things I do for my clients is make them realise this. And develop this future with them. When we value ourselves, and realise we are worth our own focus and hard work, anything can happen.

We just need to realise how strong we actually are and that we are worth our own love, time and effort, just as much as that which we give to our families. And the strangest thing of all is that - as soon as we truly realise this - we can love our families even more that we did before!

If you can identity with this, why not join me in my Facebook Private Group 'More to Me than Mum' by clicking here

Jenni Donato

Jenni now works as an Award-winning Life and Mindset Coach, helping mothers to reconnect to who they are by blending simple psychology and science to design their new beginning.